My Best Friend is in Labor, My Best Friend is in Jail

Three nights ago I dreamt that four Autistic kids were trying to break in to my bathroom while I was taking a shit.

Two nights ago I dreamt that I had to choose whether to eat my Grandmother or my Grandfather.

Last night I dreamt that I was in a Library when Mira went into labor and I had to deliver her baby before the ambulance arrived. And then the infant kept puking into my hands. And after I delivered Mira and her baby home to her mother, I went to visit Zoe, who had just gotten out of prison. She was on house arrest and I was visiting to design her some jewelry and clothing.

So I guess, in the last three days, I seriously internalized the wisdom of my elders, was a tight-ass due to previous employment, and realized that I am going to be a designer midwife.

And what are you doing with your life?