Not a lot of things push me to anxiety recently.  I've been pretty slow & steady, breathing in, rushing along, skipping on the surface, diving to the depths and in general fine.

Today was such an amazing start to my time on Block Island.  My daughter woke up at 5:30 and I didn't mind.  We ate cereal with blueberries in the fog and walked the dogs on the beach.

Then I took an amazing morning nap from 8:30 - 10AM which really recharged me and made me feel wonderful.  We walked into town in the heat.  Sunscreen, water, hats, all without a hitch. 

The hitch came later.  My daughter threw the kind of tantrum where strangers on the street think you are beating your child and you were never so thankful that they were strapped into a stroller.  She was too hot, overtired, and crashing from her lollipop.

It's so hard for me when I feel powerless.  When there is nothing I can do to soothe my kid.  Nothing I can do to ease a trouble friend.  Nothing I can do to solve a client's problem.  

My take away from this:

Sometimes we just have to go through the shit.  Sometimes not only is there no fixing it - there is also no making it feel better.  There is just being there with the person and holding steady.  So that's where I am today.  Holding steady.  Flexible.  Riding the waves of emotion and just being there.  It's no infinite wisdom. It's no trick. It's just showing up & being present.  But I am not saying it is always easy.

I Want to Sit My Ass in a Chair

Butterflies Abound - Transitions